Tyler Glenn - Trash

This is a completely unplanned post. Mostly I wanted to save the articles.

Tyler Glenn put out a video today called Trash. In it, he takes several, shall I say, blasphemous actions. I won't get into the details. I did want to point out a few good blog posts about it.

A quick blurb from Zelph on the Shelf. (always a good blog)

From a faithful mormon who gets it, or makes a very good attempt.

Mostly, I wanted to save a comment on the above link. I thought it was well written.

-Brian Shirts
I find it interesting you separate anger and pain like it's two different things that don't coexist. The other thing that gets me is that it seems you don't understand the anger and pain. Hopefully, I can help you out a little on that understanding.

If you could, take a moment and ponder how you would feel if something so big and true came out where you couldn't help but deny your faith. Something so big that it couldn't be argued and the church couldn't defend itself. Think of how you would feel knowing your whole life has been built on a lie. Something you put all you heart and belief in. Something you have worked tirelessly within, that you promote and defend with every once of your heart. Think of how you would feel knowing all that you have worked for, believed in, and the belief in the promise of the future was all a lie.

Would you not be really hurt? Would you also not be extremely angry? So many in your religion are so scared to learn anything about their religion outside of the church regardless of how truthful the information is that would expose some lies. They quickly ignore it and quickly deem it to be false and/or an attempt to destroy the church when some of it is just history. Why do you think that is? No one wants something they love so dearly and work so much for to be a lie. It's like being madly in love to someone for 20+ years, where you have a family, a house, memories, and a plan for the future. You are ready to be with them for the rest of your life but then you find out they have been lying to you the whole time. That they never loved you, that they have been dating other people, involved in things you always opposed, and just used you. You would be crushed, and you would be angry. Not only to that person but yourself.

Yes, there are a lot of exmormons that are angry and in pain. They will attack and fight the church. If you saw the person you loved that lied all those years with someone else, would you not want to warn that other person to get out of there? Would you not want to expose the person that lied to you so others don't have to feel what you felt, or to deal with the lie before it grows and they invest more? These people are very hurt. Really look at the psychology. I was a convert and left so it was a bit easier for me to deal with the lie and I'm still a little hurt and angry.

I don't have any desire to destroy the church but I would like everyone in that church to know everything about their history and the operations of the church. I believe they all deserve the truth and they can choose whether to stay or go. They just need to know.

What I find odd is how many people don't even read the essays the church has published on their official site where they are openly admitting they have lied and taught people incorrectly on the history. It's not like this stuff was just discovered. They have known this stuff for a very long time and have willingly suppressed the information till now. It makes sense to start trying to release it because the information can be controlled now with us being in the Information Age and anyone can find truth much easily than before. They can find it and back it up with evidence, references and so on.

The thing that gets me talking to my Mormon friends is their view on exmormons and this idea that they always never truly believed or weren't very strong in faith, dedication, and so on. The idea the anger is based on some evil aspect that has always been there or they allowed to be there by not being faithful enough. That couldn't be further from the truth. Too many members don't take time to really consider how they would feel if they found out their religion isn't true. If you really want to bridge the exmormons and the Mormons, you have to take time to understand why the exmormons feel and do the things they do. After that, you have to fight for them and share that feeling to other Mormons.

If the truth never has anything to hide and is always going to prevail of falsity, why tell your members to run from anything negative or opposite to what they teach? Why excommunicate those that ask questions? Why run from those that challenge the beliefs? If truth will always prevail when challenged why are the leaders so hell bent on their members not questioning, or challenging their faiths and encouraging them to only listen them and nothing else? Blind following is dangerous and telling people to do so is what people do when they have something to hide.

27 Years

27 Years ago Tracy and I were married. I don't understand why she's put up with me all these years.

Back when we were dating I used to leave her notes with song lyrics because that was the only poetry I knew and with how intense my life was at the time, it was all I had time to experience. I might as well keep that tradition going.

The Book of Love 

(Performed by Peter Gabriel)

The book of love is long and boring

No one can lift the damn thing

It's full of charts and facts, some figures and instructions for dancing

But I,

I love it when you read to me.

And you,

You can read me anything.

The book of love has music in it,

In fact, that's where music comes from.

Some of it is just transcendental,

Some of it is just really dumb.

But I,

I love it when you sing to me.

And you,

You can sing me anything.

The book of love is long and boring,

And written very long ago.

It's full of flowers and heart-shaped boxes,

And things we're all too young to know.

But I,

I love it when you give me things.

And you,

You ought to give me wedding rings.

And I,

I love it when you give me things.

And you,

You ought to give me wedding rings.

You ought to give me wedding rings.

And There Were Flowers...or Blossoms...Whatever

Continued from A Slight Diversion.

I arrived at Clark/Lake station without issue other than going through the maze that is that station. The Blue Line is a subway and the Green Line is on the 'L' so I made my way up without making a mistake and take one of the many exits. I think this was my first time on the 'L' but I might have been there years ago when I took in a Cub's game. Still, it was an easy transfer and I exited at the McCormick station and went down to the street. The convention center wasn't too visible but I headed to the Lake and knew that I'd walk into it.

McCormick Place is huge. I mean HUGE. I've been there several times for other tech conventions but the scale of the place still makes me uncomfortable for some reason. I found a woman holding a sign and I asked her where the Amazon event was...basically, keep walking and when you hit water, you've gone too far.

So, at the very end of the hall (with a small stop over Lake Shore Drive to look at the cars going underneath me) I came to the registration desk. Now, I will add here that I have a problem. It has caused some self-loathing in my life and it has become more prominent when I lost my hair. I've inherited my maternal grandfather's hair loss and my father's sweat glands. By the time I hit the registration desk, I was dripping sweat. It wasn't all that hot, but that doesn't matter to my body. I start becoming uncomfortable at 70 degrees and it was about 80. So here I am trying to register with sweat pouring off of me and becoming more and more self-conscious about it.  The woman behind the desk told me to scan my registration on the tablet...and I couldn't figure out how. OK, we're tech people, but sometimes we need human interaction. I couldn't see where the camera lens was and how to place it the right distance. Considering I was so late, I now had all 15 "women behind the desk" now looking at me wondering why the sweaty nerd can't figure out how to place a piece of paper in front of a camera. Eventually I figured it out, got my tags and I headed to the table with water on it. I had missed breakfast and I was pretty sure lunch wasn't provided. So I just sat there and cooled off for the next half an hour.

That conference was mostly a bust, but I don't think I missed much.

OK. No breakfast, no lunch. My blood sugar was falling fast. I decided to go Chicago full bore and stop at the White Castle on my way back to the "L".

The White Castle was more of a nook. Nowhere to sit, just a place to order. When I arrived, only one other person was there. And then the homeless guy came in behind me. He got my attention and said something to me. Really, that's all I know. I simply couldn't understand him. I told him "No." knowing he was asking for money. First, I was in a small place and being asked for money by a homeless guy in what essentially is a closet just made it worse. Second, I've never been one for panhandlers. Third, I didn't really have much money. I don't carry much on me and even less when I travel into the city. I held him off until I ordered two sliders. They don't taste all that good and all I was trying to do was keep from fainting from sugar loss. They guy in line gave the homeless man the change he got and eventually, so did I.

The way back was sooooo much different than the way into town. I only had to wait a bit for the Blue Line to show up but at Rosemont I walked right onto the bus to take me back to Schaumburg. At the bus station, I took a few moments to take the pictures of the blossoming trees in the lot. They were very pretty, but the smell wasn't all that fantastic.

I'm not sure why the guy killed himself by walking into the train that morning. He was no longer suffering from his problems, but transferred some of that pain onto the train conductor. My conference didn't quite work out either. Oh well. The blossoms were pretty.

A Slight Diversion

Ok, this is a travelogue. Sorry. You don't need to read it.

I had a conference in the McCormick Place last Monday. I was kind of looking forward to it, if nothing else but to have a free lunch away from the normal routine. Of course, I needed to obsess and plan my route with split second accuracy to make sure I got there at the right time. Get to bus station. Get on Route 606. Grab the Blue Line to Clark/Lake and transfer to the Green Line. Get to the McCormick stop and head east to the center. I've been there before so no worries....

About a week before, I had to get a bus card. It has been years since I rode the bus, pretty much since I started with my bad insomnia and also got the bike. (They aren't related.) They went to a credit-card type pass and one morning on the way to work, I decided to make a quick stop at the bus station and pick up a pass at the vending machine they have there. I wanted to be familiar with the situation so I wouldn't be stuck in Chicago with no way to get home because I'm too stupid to use a machine. So, mission accomplished. Hey, look, this thing accepts coins. I used to get rid of all my change on the bus. It looks like I can use this thing to get rid of my change too. Keep that in mind. Allow time to put in the money when I get there on Monday....

I counted my coins for the fateful day, mostly just to get rid of my nervous energy. I've already determined that much that will be at the conference is stuff I've already done so if there isn't anything to do, no biggie. I'll just enjoy riding the trains and seeing something different.

I woke up at 2am that morning, just like every other day. I swear there's something biological going on. I've already been tested and there isn't any real reason why I keep waking up then. That is all besides the point. I get in the car and arrive early enough to at least turn in some of that $18 in change I want to put on my new bus pass. I hide anything of any value in the car ( I read about a lot of car break-ins in Oregon at the State Parks so I'm now nervous about that ) and head to the machine. You know, putting a lot of coins in a slot of all varying sizes gets your fingers to hurting. Plus, and I never anticipated this, but every $4 or so, the machine would lock up and require me to start a new transaction. Goll, that was annoying. Still, one goal off the list.

Might as well meander towards the bus stop....Hey, look at that, the bus is just pulling in. Well not exactly. It was route 600 and not the 606 so Bingo!! I'm taking the express. Arrived at Rosemont Station in good time. I guess I'll have some time to just sit at the conference center. No biggie. Got on the train after a short wait. So far, so good. Pass works as expected. Things are going quite well.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, there's been a medical emergency on the tracks ahead and we'll be letting you off at the Jefferson Park station. There will be shuttle buses there to get you to Western where you'll pick up the train there and continue on towards downtown and the Loop. We apologize for any inconvenience."

Well, I wanted to know how all that works. I've heard on the news and traffic reports about them shuttling people over a track outage. I guess I'm going to experience it. Glad I'm not really in any kind of a hurry. So the train stopped at the station and large CTA workers rushed everyone off the train. They pounded on the windows by any lurkers, "Hey you, get off the train!" I imagine if I was fresh off the farm from my home town, I'd be incredibly intimidated by their herding us off the train platform. In my current state, I was smiling. It was something new and different. My day just became more interesting, more interesting than the conference and a stale donut would be, at least.

Outside the station, any bus that pulled into the lot was commandeered by the CTA workers and crammed full of people constantly flowing outside of the train platform. I made it on the 6th or 7th bus that stopped. I got a good seat and counted myself lucky that I was sitting. I had no idea where I was in the city. At some point, the driver announced that we were going to the Damen station. That really didn't help as I was merely a passenger of my fate at the time. Along the way, I just watched the city go by. All the buses on the street were filled with people being moved between stations. The sidewalks became full of hopeful passengers wondering why no buses were stopping for them. Seriously, some stops had well over 100 people waiting. The buildings were fairly uniform 3 story buildings and almost every other storefront was vacant. I noticed that the placards were ads hawking vacations for my hometown. That was kind of neat and I felt the hick desire to tell someone that uninteresting fact. I wanted to take a picture but again fought the urge. People were pretty silent, just wanting their day to begin and not show how upset they may be lest others consider them petty.

When we arrived at Damen Station, we were once again greeted by "Get off the bus!" this time by the driver.  I again smiled at the rudeness that seems to be part and parcel of Chicago behavior. They weren't perceiving this as rude, just being direct. I tried to snap a picture of the Traverse City ad as I left but the result was just a blur. The entrance was just a narrow door and they were thrown wide to allow all the people to enter. It was a fairly old station and aside from the electronic pass readers, it had the feel of the 1800's. The next 20 or so minutes were spent on the stairs as the platform was full. Still, no trains went by. It seems our promise of getting picked up down the line was hollow.

My attempt at capturing the TC ad as I was shouted off the bus.

I passed the time just taking the surroundings in. I'm fairly amazed at how we've let things deteriorate in this country, infrastructure-wise. I'm a proponent of "Take care of it or take it down." The station was rusting and not all that conveniently placed, although I'm sure the residents of the area depended upon this system in their lives as much as I did now. People began to be frustrated and started leaving which freed up space on the platform and where I eventually made my way. I found a little nook to rest and started a conversation with a woman approaching retirement age as well as a younger woman who worked for a start-up writing iPad software for schools. (I kept silent about my opinions of Android solutions that are cheaper by far.) Eventually, a worker came by yelling that the tracks had cleared and trains would be arriving shortly but they will be busy as they will be picking up the backlog. The whole outage lasted well over 2 hours and since the Blue Line is one of the busiest, I was sure I'd have another 40 minutes or so to wait. Yep. While waiting I struck up more conversations and another guy kept shooting glances at me about his frustration. I marveled at how much can be said non-verbally and how he found my face as an inviting one that such sarcasm would be interpreted correctly.

All in all, it was a nice day so far. I'd experienced something new, met some new people, and even observed a confused pigeon on the roof of a nearby shop while we were all waiting for the 'L'. I'm sure I saw it's confusion as it stared at hundreds of people up so high just doing nothing. I appreciated how well behaved everyone was as we hear so much how people suck when in such groups, and this was a very diverse crowd. Everyone still said "excuse me" and "sorry". I also was struck by how beautiful people can be. I know that might be an odd thing to say, but for an introvert like myself, seeing the beauty of random people is something fairly new to me. I wondered what interesting stories people had to share if situations were different. Yeah, my plans for the day were shot to a good degree. That breakfast of doughy goodness was long gone but it was worth it so far. I might as well forge ahead and see what else the day brought. I finally slipped on to about the 10th train that stopped and with my back pressed against the door, I went on to Chicago.

Continued....

http://wgntv.com/2016/04/18/part-of-cta-blue-line-suspended-after-person-struck/

Doomed Marriage? Not necessarily.

I’ve blogged a bit about this in the past but not on this phrase but on life changes. My interest in this article is from the “Beware of What Saving Yourself Might Bring” section on. When that whole "Mid-life Crisis" hit and I re-examined what I believe, my politics, my relationships, it did create a crisis, and one that the article addresses pretty well for that matter. I don't like the fact society looks this occurrence as a completely selfish exercise. As a society, we don't want men to change and that is the real culprit. Men stand firm until the pressures just make us want to redo our lives in a flurry of activity instead of allowing us to grow and change throughout our lives.

And it isn't just men that go through this. My changes ultimately led to Tracy reexamining her life too and it led to years of rediscovery of who we were together. For us, so far, it has worked out. I know many couples where it hasn't worked out and has led to divorces, some amicable, some less-so. And it doesn't stop. We need to continue to talk about things, sometimes painful things. Many months ago I told her that I was still not where I wanted to be, and I started to change again where I was in our relationship. So far it is improving. We are different people than we were just 5 years ago. We have changed within the constraints of our commitments to each other and our family trying to keep realistic in what is possible. We also leave room for each of us to grow. We are two people that hang out together in an intimate fashion. Perhaps my view of our marriage has become more fluid than it was in the past, but I think we are doing alright.

Article - If You Ever Use This Phrase Your Marriage is Probably Doomed