Monday, December 28, 2009

Dealing with depression

Rating:★★★
Category:Other
http://www.utahkrishnas.org/ondemand/sundaytalks/2009/depression/Dealing%20With%20Depression.mp3

I liked the part in the talk, around minute 18, where he was disturbed by his phone. But really, around the same time, he mentioned that a symptom of depression is "disinclination". I really liked that. It really describes some of the feelings I had when I was depressed.

Saturday, December 26, 2009

Well, I survived another Christmas

“Well, I survived another Christmas.” That’s what I think as I shovel yet another 4 inches of global warming from my driveway (Third time today). The urge to get out of the house and do something is overwhelming. I always attribute it to my Groesser genes but it more than likely is to keep the thoughts quiet.

“Why didn’t I create a dll to do that task?”

“How would my life be different if I asked that girl to marry me instead of Tracy? Heck, how would my life be different if I had even asked that other girl out?”

“Do Buddhists ‘Hunger and thirst after righteousness’? Do they ever want printed copies of their scriptures? If so, does that mean they have to repent?”

“I hope Bennet doesn’t inherit the Groesser’s short legs.”

See, it’s a painful place there. That’s the real reason I work, enjoy shoveling snow, mowing the lawn… less interaction with my own mind.

So, Tracy and I bought our own gifts this year. Mine was planned. I knew what I wanted. Tracy just came in one day and announced that she just bought her Christmas present. I wish other things in life were so easy. The kids did alright this year. Bennet’s eyes lit up the first time we placed a gift bag in front of him. Hayden got the “Air Hog” from his aunt Lynette. Ellie now has plenty of dolls and Madsen has a few more toy cars. Since we routinely purge toys from the mix each month or so, there should be some room.

I’m still enjoying my life. I love my job and the urge to work constantly is a steady drain on my system. I have had to knock myself out with drugs to get myself back to sleep at night. At 2am, my brain is ready to work on the unsolved issues. That is incredibly annoying. I mean, I love my job, but I also need sleep. This past week I had to contemplate taking a day off just to get a couple more hours of sleep. At 7am or so, the baby wakes up and the day has to begin.

I honestly don’t understand how Tracy does it. There must be some hormone that kicks in and keeps her from killing the children. They run her ragged. Constant demands from morning to night. She says that is the reason why she stays up late at night, just so she can be by herself.

“Well, I survived another Christmas.” That's about the best I can come up with.

http://groesser.multiply.com/photos/album/28/Christmas_2009

Monday, December 21, 2009

America is dying

I would like to thank all those who voted democratic in killing off more of America last night. We have started once again to put on the shackles of slavery to a government who does not care about our desires and opinions. Our elected officials have sold us out. I can say with honor that I vote and I did not vote for a single one of those tyrants and traitors to the constitution.

My god have mercy on our children, because we just destroyed their hopes for a better future.

Monday, December 14, 2009

Priesthood Lesson #46 - Martyrdom.

I never did finish off what I wanted to talk about in the lesson this week.

lesson

So what I decided to do is raise a few questions and follow-ups here.

Some follow up on the succession to Joseph Smith:

http://en.fairmormon.org/Succession_in_the_Presidency_of_the_Church

http://www.fairlds.org/apol/ai031.html

The latter link has some treatment of the manifestations some claimed to have when BY spoke.

I also refer you to D&C 107 for some definition on levels of authority.

I also stated during the lesson that 9 of the 12 apostles when JS died went on to the west and followed BY. Here is a note on apostles and their state.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chronology_of_the_Quorum_of_the_Twelve_Apostles_(LDS_Church)

I know that Lyman Johnson didn’t go…I can’t find anything right away about the other two…I’ll look into it more when I get a chance.

Also, the role that Hyrum had played. D&C 124 talks about Hyrum being the new patriarch of the church and also that he filled the role that Oliver Cowdery vacated…not sure what that meant.

The role of “sealing with their own blood”. The best I can reference on this is that you can’t show you believe something other than to die for it. Not sure how useful it is as many a Nazi died for their beliefs too. (Not to equate the two.) There might be some significance in that JS started once again the preaching to the dead and vicarious ordinances that Christ instituted and were lost. Not sure.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Programmer Angst

I'm supposed to be on vacation while my wife is out of town. Yeah, right. I have so many programs floating through my head wanting to get out...I'm not sure how I get over that. I've always been a bit obsessive and here I am thinking on how to properly set calendar database requests or how to multithread on remote servers. Not easy being crazy.